Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
BRING THE BAGELS
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize
