yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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