yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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