hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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