she smelled like a LAN party
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
