I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
