Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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