I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
