babies were throwing up all over the place
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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