I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
He told me they were just razor bumps!
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I'm always down for nudity.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
