You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
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