Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
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