i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
All I want is dick and wine.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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