yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Randomize
