you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
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