I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
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