Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize