No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Randomize
