Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
