READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Randomize
