The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
