Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
