But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
