I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
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