he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
