were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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