At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Randomize
