I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
