A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
It all started with a game of naked twister.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
