ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
