Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
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