So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
