when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
