that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Randomize