WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize