people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
