it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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