I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
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