marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
