ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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