butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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