The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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