Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
