awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Randomize
