What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
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