We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
