I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Randomize