Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize
