Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Randomize