Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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