Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
